A New Year for Reflection

A new beginning

Welcome to 2015… I want to wish you all a Happy New Year, but before I go on about wishing you all the best in love, happiness and radiant health, I have to back track a year or so. A friend of mine, a beautiful, young, vibrant woman who is both caring and nurturing, has inspired me to write about suicide. Not exactly the cheerful topic you’d think of discussing at the beginning of a new year, but nevertheless essential for this new beginning.  It’s not she, but so many others surrounding her that are dropping like flies, despite her cry that “I want to help you”.  Personally, suicide has hit home for me and my family this year, maybe you know someone as well. For us it’s been two young boys, separate incidents; one was 16, a close friend of my middle son’s, the other 18, a friend and mentor for my older son.  It’s not just these two young people I’m writing about, or the ones that my friend, my sister in healing, has had to deal with. It just seems to be happening more and more, especially among young people in our community.

Depression is a lonely thing

How can you let yourself feel so alone that you don’t even try to reach out to anybody? Depression is a lonely thing; you perceive that no one cares, that there’s no way out, or that things will never change. You can feel so down on yourself that you feel useless to the point where you start apologizing to people for your existence. But to end it all so finally? To go ahead with such a violent, permanent act? Why? Don’t you know that someone cares? Don’t you know that so many more care than you can even imagine? You are a life force put on Earth for a purpose. Yes, life can sock it to you one punch after another until you just can’t breathe anymore. Beyond heart-broken you feel just plain broken: empty, dull, life-less. Being so overwhelmed and not knowing where to go or who to reach out to can seem harder to deal with then just ending it. But life is worth living. We are meant to be here to learn and grow. We simply can’t go on to the next level of existence without the growth that occurs from our experiences here on Earth.

Our ultimate goal is to come back into harmony and balance

We are all in this together, not as people helping people, but as one person, one universe, one cell. This connection should be known because it is real and does exist. Ask any scientist, we are all made up of energy that only appears to be separated. What one does affects us all for better or for worse. Just to understand what a privilege it is to be here should be enough for us to cherish our lives and work through the darkness until it becomes total lightness. While it may be true that there can be no light without dark, no love without pain, no joy without sorrow, I do believe that our ultimate goal, our natural instinct is to always come back into harmony and balance, to LOVE and be LOVED. If we can’t feel loved it’s because we have a blockage somewhere. It could be something that happened in our past, a traumatic event or series of events, big or small, which happened once or repeatedly, that made us feel scared, frightened, ashamed, rejected, belittled, different, unworthy or just plain overwhelmed. It’s usually something we have totally forgotten about, but it always remains stored as an emotional and physical reaction in our bodies waiting to be triggered. The trigger itself can be big or small, something in our current daily lives that is usually only marked by a vague feeling of uneasiness or annoyance or as big a reaction as fear or panic. We are almost never aware that it’s a trigger from something in our past. For example it could be as simple as someone being late, the smell of something in the air, or the way a spouse reacts when we say something to them. We don’t know why we are so reactive, but we are. And as much as we think we’ve matured, it doesn’t go away as we age until it’s actually released from the body.  For more on this go to Emotional Support and Healing.

You are truly loved no matter what you think

As for the young people who decided to go through with suicide this year, it’s a crying shame.  It pains me to see that someone so young could not find another way out or could not ask friends when help was needed. It was a rude awakening for the whole community, but especially the youth that were closest. Yes it is a lesson, and as mentioned before we are put on Earth to grow from our lessons, but they are the ones who have now lost their innocence, who must grow up ahead of their natural cycle and face the harsh side of reality. If there is one message I truly want to share, it is that life is so precious and you are truly loved, no matter what you think. There is always, always, always someone you can talk to or simply be with, even if it’s just to get through that one moment when you feel like you’re at the bottom of the pit. But people are not mind readers and are usually so immersed in their own lives that they don’t clue in. You need to be able to say “Hey, would you mind, I really need someone to talk to right now.” And the other thing is you are deeply cared about, even if you can’t see it or people don’t show it. People are busy; it doesn’t mean they don’t care. As an example, one young man who decided to commit suicide perhaps thinking his friends might not have cared about him, ended up, without an announcement in the newspaper or by social media, with a church filled to standing room with friends, old and young, who cared enough to come in person and say goodbye. So I fully support the message “Please do reach out to anyone, as hard as it may seem.” If you’re in Campbell River or the surrounding area, don’t be shy to come see me if you need to, like my friend and sister in healing, I don’t mind listening and helping in any way I can.

Any with that I truly wish you all the best in 2015, may your life be reflective of all your dreams to come…may you live in love, happiness and radiant health.